Waiting for the second time.........

Today we were seen at City of Hope by a group of three doctors and two assistants. Upon entering the room, I was wondering what was up. They had already received our biopsy results from Idaho, and we had just done Corban's seven vials of blood to help determine the results. The doctor told us that this was in fact not a Xanthogranuloma....... It was a malignancy. My heart sunk; we were just here to make sure that it was not rare leukemia sometimes associated with a Xanthogranuloma.

Corban had to get a biopsy on his side for the second time. I had to hold him because the needle was not as friendly as he liked. After they shot in the litocane, they took multiple samples. He played Mine craft on my IPod while they took the samples. He was brave! 

It is the little things everyday that shake our reality. Corban cannot swim because of the his huge ulcer
 on his side, and we have been at a family reunion. It has been emotional and difficult to be in this waiting stage alone at  a family reunion without anyone knowing what is going on.
 
So I have tried to become creative with what kinds of things he can do. Pictures is a new one. I am letting him explore his world using one of my nice cameras. YIKES! He said to me after taking a few pictures, " Mom, I want to learn how to use a camera so I can take pictures of my kids when I grow up."  I pray with all my heart that that "someday" is in his future. 

Corban knows that we do not know what is wrong with his side, but he does not yet understand the entire extent of what could be wrong. We will wait until we have solid information to share with him.   

To say there have been angels is an understatement. Two friends have brought dinner, and even my neighbor helped while we were at the appointment. I have felt my grandma with me and have found great comfort in prayer. One night, in a really dark moment of many tears, I read  in the Doctrine and Covenants, "I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts and mine angels round about you to bear you up." I am so, so grateful for the strength this brings; grateful for so many little things.